**Alert** This is not family/life in the middle related but one of those like 'Dear Abby (Brianna)' posts..no one wrote to me with the subject 'Dear Brianna' ...in fact, no one wrote to me at all...but that's how we're handling this situation. I'm going to throw this advice out there and if you read it and like it cool, if you read it and don't like it cool, love thy neighbor carry on I apologize I wasted a few minutes of your time for you to read this and not like it. BUT I read these things one Facebook, buzzfeed, twitter, instagram, NoOneGivesAShitagram. Valentine's Day is fast approaching and I'm seeing some people that are not handling it well. It is not against the law to not have a valentine on the big day. I also want to touch base on people that ARE in relationships that are getting into some habits that aren't always social media friendly...And then I'll get into my advice on how I'm handling being single this time of year. I have a little 'how to' guide on how to do my version of the single ladies dance.
1) If you instagram pictures of you and your boy/girlfriend, that's fine I'm sometimes a bitter single person but I'm not THAT bitter. I get that you have cute moments and you want to share them with the world. Do it. If you're happy, you should spread that happiness like it's nutella on white bread fresh out of the toaster with Spongebob playing in the background at 11 o'clock on a Saturday Morning.
1a) If ALL of the pictures you post of you and your love buddy are make out sessions, then we have an issue. keep some of that private. Besides, if you're focusing too much on the angle of the camera shot, you're taking some focus off of why you're doing the tongue tango with your boo in the first place. If my significant other ever said "kiss me so I can post it online" I would stand up, go to the fridge and take all the beer, take all the rum if we had any and leave them. 'Pics or it didn't happen' does not apply to your love life so enjoy your time with the one you love. You don't need to share ALL of it. Don't invite the general public into your relationship. Look at celebrity couples?
1b) If all of your pictures you post about your boyfriend are of him playing his video games and captioned something like 'He's on his 12th hour of call of duty, so proud <3' or 'He hasn't looked at me in 3 days but he's doing what he loves <3' or 'He's so cute when he gets angry while playing Halo <3' then #1, you need to stop posting them, and #2, you need to dump him...for real, moderate video games are fine but I have seen a few culprits of this. If you don't post it then I don't really care because at least you're keeping it your business. But you are showing the whole interweb how much your boyfriend ignores you and I'm judging your relationship skills for it. This isn't planet fitness, the internet is not judgement free.
1c) Stop saying 'babe' and 'baby' to each other, or when referring to the other in a status or tweet. it makes your followers vomit. I GUESS once in a while is fine, but don't over do it.
This pretty much sums it up for people that are in relationships. Now, I love cute couples. I'm an official third wheel with most of my friends and I'm totally fine with it. I have no problem with 'always a bridesmaid never a bride.'
I'd like to move onto the single people. I'm going on my twenty-second year of being single so I have some experience. This is the basis of this post.
step 1- Be happy about who you are. If you love Harry Potter, love reading, are into sports, don't like dark chocolate, you're short, you look for humor in everything. You enjoy a night out with your friends but also enjoy nights in either with your friends or alone writing a blog and watching the Hunger Games. You drink enough to satisfy your thirst, but not like an alcoholic sailor, but get the occasional buzz. You drink mass amounts of coffee and you get a high when you go to the gym, then #1, you should be darn proud of all of that and #2- you're probably me....but the point here is look at all your little quirks and love them how you would want a boy/girlfriend to love them. Example, I take back roads. If I have the gas money, I take the long way to get to my destination. I love driving and jamming out and taking in the scenic Maine backgrounds. I get crap for it but "it's not about the destination, it's about the trip to the destination" If you have a quirk or habit that puts you in a good mood, don't change it to please someone else. Which brings us to...
Step 2- Don't do things out of impressing someone. Only tell them you share the same interest if you REALLY DO share the same interest. I saw a tweet yesterday before the superbowl:
So dress to impress, but Only if it's what YOU believe in too. If you fake like sports, it is obvious. Sports fans can tell who is real and who is fake. So if you hate sports, then hate sports. There is probab;y something really great about you making sports knowledge unnecessary. Ask any girl. They didn't pick their boyfriend up because he lied and said something like "I LOVE girlcode, I watch it every day!"
Step 3- Watch Girlcode. If you don't get any advice from it, then watch it for entertainment. It's fantastic.
3a) Watch Chelsey Lately.Step 4- Do not post how desperate you are. I myself post how SINGLE I am..like when I say things like watching TV with my dog, or having a warm cuddly night with my heating pad watching ENews, and stuff but Do not look as thirsty as a fish in a desert. Don't say things like "I really need a cuddle buddy :(" Good husbands don't come from liking a facebook status that was posted after a few glasses of wine. Don't post a bunch of edited and strongly filtered selfies saying #nofilter becasuse if you catch a cuddle buddy thanks to that post, and then you wake up next to each other and you look like you've been attacked by tracker jackers, Cuddle buddy applicant #3 is going to know you had a filter on that. Same goes for 'pass or rate, or truth is or wait, not..it's pass or date? something like that. You don't want to tell your kids "Well I liked dad's status back in 2013, and he posted on my wall 15 minutes later 'Date ;)' Unless you'd be into that. It doesn't matter how you met someone as long as you're truly happy, and deeply in love. I'm just saying, We are a generation that's slipping away from human contact, and we hide behind our keyboards.
Sidenote- Don't say anything to someone through a text, or facebook message that you can't say to them face to face. That's just a quality to hold onto as we slip deeper and deeper into a hashtag revolution,
Step 6- Stems from a recent post I had the other day that I feel pretty strongly about. Don't be high maintenance.
I think this wraps up most of my thoughts. Don't be desperate, don't be fake, and love yourself. You, whoever you are, are a really cool person. Everyone out there likes at least one thing about you. Example, someone might hate that I take back roads and the long way when we're driving somewhere, but they appreciate my baseball passion. So if you're single on Valentines day don't get down in the dumps. You will survive. Maybe avoid instagram and facebook and twitter so You don't see all the lovey dovey posts. Wait it out 24 hours and then hit up wal mart and get all the discounted candy you want. Or buy yourself a teddy bear. For all of you single people, Consider this picture to be dedicated from me to you:
I also want to share one of my favorite buzzfeed lists hosted my 3 of my favorite ladies, so take some time to read, and embrace these messages
http://www.buzzfeed.com/przshly07/what-its-like-to-be-single-as-told-by-jennifer-la-8ttl
I hope this helps some of you, maybe you don't agree with any of it, that's fine. I'm not here to instigate and disagreements. But we all know that one person that doesn't know how to be single. So enjoy your life whether you're happy in a relationship, single or in a flirtationship because those are fun too!
you can tweet me at Briannajohns2, you can email any questions, comments or concerns and hey, I kind of like this advice column thing so I might keep it up if anyone trusts me with handling their life concerns. brianna.johnston37@gmail.com
Find something to smile about today and everyday!
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