Beauty and the Johnstons

What a week! Jimmy Fallon continues to inspire me with his late night endeavors. Catching Fire came out to DVD (as if you didn't know I would mention that). Dad and I watched Captain Phillips. OH and Annika Chandler, Morgan, and their fantastic cast members hit the stage for Beauty and the Beast.

Starting off per usual with current events, besides the fact that it is effing cold out there. It warmed up for like 5 minutes yesterday which I'm assuming was just Earth farting. I wouldn't be surprised if America was the asshole of the world. And then it got frigid again!

In better news to get us prepared for springtime..

MEAN GIRLS IS HAVING A REUNION

The movie is approaching its 10 year anniversary April 30th and I can only imagine how excited my generation is to see the plastics get back together. Rachel McAdams has put a dress on hold at the store '1,3,5.' Karen is unsure of if it will rain that day. The day does fall on a Wednesday though so be sure to wear pink! What will happen if you don't? well then.. YOU CAN'T SIT WITH US. 

**Coach Karr will be allowed into the reunion as all girls are now over 18. 

Speaking of movies, my dad can either be the best, or worst person to watch movies with..

I was watching Catching Fire the other day:

dad came in, right at the part where she's about to go up into the arena. So she goes up the tube and they say 'Let the 75th Hunger Games, begin' Stevie J over here looks at me all confused.. 

"75th? they've made 75 movies already?" 

""This is the second movie..."

"The guy just said it was the 75th Hunger games...well that's confusing..."

Granted he IS kidding...he has about as much emotion as a rock with a neutral face painted on it. Even when he's kidding he seems so serious, and legitimately disturbed , that it's the second movie, and yet the 75th year of the games. 

And then the fight scenes which are up his ally. One of Steve's famous quotes is "all the best movies have a car chase in them" I wonder if he realizes that the Hannah Montana movie has a car chase in it....anyways, he gets into the action parts of movies...

"Oops!" 

"How did she miss?!"

 "Ooooo"

 "LOOK OUT!"  

These are just a few, but it is a known fact that dad Johnston can not watch an intense scene, and not say one of these. Katniss falls down: Oops!  Someone throws a knife: "Look out!" 

Watch an action movie with this guy, and you'll understand. They are like reactions to him. 

I also bought a goofy movie this day. If you're a 90's kid and you haven't seen this movie, we have an issue. I've never actually owned this movie. My dad and mom would go to the library when I was little and we would always make a trip out of it. I always always always had him take out A Goofy Movie on VHS. and I want to go in and see if they have a record of how many times my dad rented it on his library card

Later on we watched Captain Phillips. Overall, he's good to watch movies with because he doesn't talk all that much, and he pays attention. -Nothing bothers me more than when I sit to watch a movie with someone and they're distracted with something else. I hate hearing "What just happened?!" 

So anyways, we're watching this and there is a part where they almost escape the pirates and the Navy is looking on and my dad went on for 10 minutes

"How was nobody watching the boat?!" 

"I still can't believe no one was watching the boat..."

"Well if they had just been watching the boat....." 

You get the idea. My dad is a pretty smart guy so he sees stupid things and goes on and on. It's Hollywood dad, they had to make it exciting. But if it's too exciting that's when you get the "LOOK OUT!" calls from him almost spilling his Corona and lime and jumping out of his Red Sox rocking chair.

So throughout the day I had watched the Lizzie Mcguire movie, A Goofy Movie, Catching Fire and Captain Phillips....This is a true story: 

"You try watching the Lizzie Mcguire movie, Catching Fire, A Goofy Movie, and Captain Phillips all in the same day and tell me you don't get some of the scenes confused...Like, I thought those were the Somalian Pirates in District 11, and I was like Peeta gave them the money why are they still shooting.. and that concert! Powerline and Lizzie rocking out the stage! and the fog machine they used in the school gym for Max to impress Roxanne?! I mean Katniss and Peeta had an allergic reaction to it, but he became like the coolest kid in school! They were fine after they jumped into some salt water ...except Captain Phillips was all like get out of these waters! and now Max and Roxanne are dating, Katniss is leading a rebellion, Captain Phillips is all good and Lizzie is an Italian Pop Star...and I have too much time on my hands..."

Continuing on, I logged into facebook the other day and came across something my brother posted...Andrew doesn't really post much so it's pretty interesting when he does. The story he told in just a couple sentences reminds me of why I keep a blog about my family and our fun loving antics...

My mom commented a short while later saying that recently, she tried to change the channel on the TV with the phone...and she wasn't even drinking...

On to the big event!! 

Annika, Chandler and Morgan hit the stage last night in Windham Center Stage theater's production oBeauty and the Beast. All of the kids were amazing and Belle and the Beast almost had me in tears! Performances by everyone were spectacular, and they are all between 2nd and 8th grade....so much talent.  This was Chandler and Morgan's first time on stage ever and you never would have noticed. Annika marks this as her 4th play and she had a speaking part as the book seller in the beginning. The one that gives Belle her favorite book. I like watching little kids in plays more than adults. You can see their imagination going wild in their eyes. They feel famous and their effort to bring the story to life is so natural because they're so young and still believe in princesses and monsters and to them on stage it is very real and that makes it AWESOME.

That about wraps us up for today. I will however leave you with this, 

This picture still makes me really happy and I think I realized why...The 2 hints of diversity, next to adoptive parents, the vast range of age, a moustache and not everyone could make it? this picture is a Johnston family picture to a T. The Johnston's thank you Ellen! 

2014 Oscars

Considering this blog has been home to a lot of hollywood buzz and celebrity gossip in the past, I feel like I should be like all of the others and have an Oscar Special. So here it is.
I have been waiting for the Oscars since......the last Oscars.....I love movies, I love movie stars, and a non-shallow, non-superficial way, I just love the emotion and hype and excitement. People hate that fashion is a big part of the red carpet. I love it. It doesn't matter what people wear, but the dress (or suit) is a way of expression. It's also like fantasy window shopping. I look at some and I'm like "oooo damn Lupita! I'm going to stick to sweatpants and moccasin slippers..girrrrrrrrl you lookin fine!" OR "Anna Kendrick....your...face looks nice tonight!" OR "Hey Jennifer you look- oops...she's on the ground again." By the way, she's not the only one that took a tumble pre-Oscars. I was walking up to my friends house for a mini Oscar viewing party. I have my bag of cool ranch Doritos in hand, (if you say ew to cool ranch Doritos, get out of America). So I'm rushing to get into her apartment, and I get out of the car, there was no light on the walkway and I didn't realize that there was a step UP to the walkway....faceplant..My toenail was broken to pieces, and I can't move my left shoulder and I think I hit my head...the worst part? THE DORITOS BROKE MY FALL MEANING THE DORITOS BROKE. I might be a fat kid at heart if I heard a crunch and instead of thinking "Was that a bone?" I was like "F***! THE DORITOS ARE CRUSHED" I got up rubbed some dirt, (mixed with cool ranch flavoring) in it and continued making my way to the Oscars. Jen's fall? all graceful, almost pulled another girl down with her, 2 security guards by her side pulling her up, everyone making sure she's ok and she gets up unscathed and laughing it off. I mean yes, It's great that she carries herself so well and isn't embarrassed by it...but like...why do celebrities have it so easy...In case you missed it, try to tell us apart..

I'm the bottom one..I'm not sure why E was following me...but let's acknowledge the last rule of the Oscars drinking game...

Also, this is a true Johnston story that I posted to facebook last night regarding the incident: 

"Was rushing to get to a friends apartment in time for the Oscars last night and faceplanted on the walkway crushing my bag of doritos and possibly really hurting my big toe and shoulder. In the process, I crushed my bag of Doritos I was carrying. (They were still good though!) This morning I told my dad about the fall and he laughed hysterically...then tonight he ate the rest of my bag of Doritos...father of the year award goes to Steve.."

Anna Kendrick. I was not a fan of the dress, but I am a fan of her, so the dress doesn't matter at all. I know I know (the dress should never matter, it's only the person and who they are on the inside that counts. Calm down folks. I'm merely stating my thoughts. 

Moving on. To get all cheesy for a second, Anna Kendrick is from Portland Maine. Maine is hard to get out of and make a name for yourself. She has proved that it is possible and I find it really inspiring. And she's just someone that I would love to hang out with and go to lunch with or get drinks with or go on a road trip with.

Ellen. 

I really hope that her name alone brought a smile to your face. She was incredible as host, (as expected).  I love how we live in a time where this is possible. So I'm watching the Oscars, and she pulls out her phone talking about how she wants to take a picture of her looking at the whole audience, to see it from her point of view. 

So she takes the picture and uploads it and seconds later, I open twitter and there it is! a real time picture, as promised

(we know that this isn't Ellen's only picture tweeted of the night, we'll get to that) 

At one point, Ellen asked who was hungry. Obviously, a 3.5 hour award show can cause some belly rumbles. Ellen being Ellen was all like "who wants pizza?" lol funny Ellen, thinking it was a joke. The best part of this, was the beautiful Kerry Washington. I've never experienced pregnancy cravings, but I have an inkling she was craving pizza...

Shortly after, This actually happened...

Edgar, "The pizza guy" was on Ellen's live post Oscar show the next morning. The producers told him the pizza was for some writers backstage and that he should "wait there" for someone to retrieve the pizza. Ellen grabbed him, said follow me, and next thing he knows, he's on stage! 

Also on the show, Ellen gave him the tip that she collected in Pharell's hat, a total of $1000. Way to help a local business Ellen! 

Ellen continued the laughs, she came down the steps of the stage and proposed a "selfie" with Meryl Streep. I don't know about you, but that opportunity presents itself all the time......sarcasm. Ellen then invited Juila Roberts, Channing Tatum, Luita Nyong'o (whose brother excitedly and adorably jumped to the occasion, Jennifer Lawrence, and Bradley Cooper (because those 2 can't do anything without the other and we wouldn't have it any other way!) Jared Leto was invited from the other side of the audience, but he was unfortunately cut out. which really sucks for him because he was the most excited for this photo op. As they're all posing, if you listen, Jennifer Lawrence being Jennifer Lawrence suggests, "If you want it retweeted so much, maybe someone should grab a boob..." THAT. CLEVER. CLEVER. GIRL. She knew Channing Tatum was right behind her, IT WAS AN INVITATION. She's such a quick thinker...I would suggest the same if Channing were right there. The suggestion was turned down, and the photo still took the cake as the most retweeted in history with 3 Million retweets. 

Jared, Jennifer, Meryl, Channing, Ellen,  Julia, Kevin, Bradley, Brad, Lupita, Angelina, You know when you call them by the first names, and not go full name on them  for their celebrity status, it sounds like roll call for a really cute third grade class picture. But it's not and I think my new goal in life is to print this picture, and get it signed by each and every one of them. Remind me not to die until this is accomplished. 

Ellen really brought some life to the show and loosened it up a bit from what we're used to. 

Moving on to what the Oscars are actually for, there were some awards given last night! Most people ignore the acceptance speeches because they're all the same "I'd like to thank my mom, dad,agent,publicist, stylist, director, co-stars, God, Jesus, my first boss, my dog, my uncle Mike, Ellen Degeneres, my cat, you get the picture. Lupita was one of the social media favorite speeches and why not?! She had everyone in tears. everyone. Steve Mcqueen her director, Benedict Cumberbatch, everyone that the camera lens touched was shedding a tear

She went on to inspire youth and say that every little child, no matter where you are, your dreams are valid. Such a good message. She came out of no where, beat all these A list stars really sending the message that anything is possible. 

My personal favorite acceptance speech was Best Actor, Matthew McConaughey (I just want it known how many times I had todouble check on how to spell his name....Like...for real, who knew 'Matthew would be so difficult to sound out..

If you don't feel like watching the whole video, he gives an inspirational philosophy that your hero is yourself 10 years from now. You're never going to reach it, but you're always going to chase it and be better because of that.  With a big dream of going into writing, his words meant a lot and I will hold onto his idea throughout my adventures into wherever life takes me. 

Sidenote, I just love his voice and when everyone wants Morgan Freeman to narrate their lives, I want him. in fact, when I finally break into writing movies, I'm casting him as the narrator. 

With his win, it marks yet another year the Leonardo DiCaprio stays seated throughout the whole show. We were all pulling for him but I have no doubt that he will get it eventually, and you shouldn't either because 'doubt' is a word I'm trying to get removed from the dictionary, but I doubt that will ever happen.....

12 years a slave won best picture, I haven't seen it yet but it comes out to DVD soon and I will be right on top of that! just from the previews I can tell it's amazing. Once I get through my stack of books I need to read, the novel version will also be making it's way to my eyes. 

If you watched the Oscars, you're probably waiting for me to talk about the John Travolta incident, I decided to not include a personal take on it because I really feel bad for the guy, we don't know if it was a fluke with the teleprompter or what not, nerves, the hype of being on the big stage, it's John Travolta he's impressed us enough with performances enough that I'm going to let it slide. So be nice to him! (I did however 'travoltify' my name...."

I leave you with this link: 

http://www.buzzfeed.com/whitneyjefferson/jennifer-lawrences-best-moments-at-the-oscars?bffb

check it out for a good laugh

Next post I promise will return to the regularly scheduled hectic, chaotic, fun loving, can only take in small doses, Johnston Family. The little Johnstons are in the local Beauty and the Beast play  so there will be pictures and a write up on that! 

Twitter; Briannajohns2

Instagram; bjohnston2

brianna.johnston37@gmail.com

Go out, be awesome, and watch Ellen!

Lost is a state called Maine

I'm going to be really original and write do a write up about life in the state if Maine. Love it or hate it, it's unique. Maine is like that non popular, but not weirdo kid in the class. It has its quirks, and things that make you love it. And it also has its 'WTF' times. It's wicked hahd to describe. So put on your flannel, pop open a bud, and come join the pahty!

Maine can be summed up in 3 pots: 
-Pot Heads
-Pot Holes
-Potluck dinners
With the recent bills passed, pot heads in Portland rejoice
Pot holes, Because Winter happens
Potlucks, because we don't do catering.big party? Everyone bring a dish! (which usually ends up being 50 bowls of potato salad)

My family is all about the Maine life. My mom grew up in Naples. So she was in the mix of the Sebago Lakes region. The happiest portion of the state. The southern Bar Harbor. The big summer attraction for tourists that don't want to drive all the way up to Bar Harbor... My father grew up in Aroostook County. Also known as Potato County. I'm not even kidding, where my grandmother lives, there are more miles of potato fields than tar. In the winter, they mostly use snowmobiles to get around. The gas station is lines of them. in fact, the snowmobile and ATV dealerships are as common as car dealerships. They have a couple radio stations...and if you're eating a meal, any time of day, it's called 'suppah' (supper for those of you still getting used to the accent). So if it's like..let's say 11 AM and someone asks "You want a suppah?" Don't think you're having dinner already and it's almost bed time. The northern lifestyle is not for the weak. You have to be prepared to drop your cell phone service, wi-fi, and know how to play a good hand of cribbage. Don't lead with a 5, 10, or facecard. I learned that in my last 3 cribbage games I played with my grandfather before he passed. Out of all the cousins, and siblings I have, somehow I got some one on one bonding time with him and my grandmother. I was 12 years old, and the cribbage board was on the kitchen table. So while Grammy cleaned up the kitchen and did the dishes, she was our audience. We were tied a game a piece so we played a third as a tie breaker. He won, because he is the Johnston cribbage champion. But he sure did teach me a lot about the game that day. Plus what else is there to do?! I already told you, if you're not fishing or hunting, play cribbage. You might snub the lifestyle, but to the Johnstons, it's family time. There is always food to be had, a riddle to solve, or cards to play. I wish I knew exactly how many decks of cards my grandmother had in her kitchen drawer. If it's not your turn at the pegging game yet, you usually warm up your shuffling skills with a game of solitaire, clock, or gather the whoever else is free for a game of rummy. In the winter time, If you're not in the big suit and helmet running the snow sled around the tater fields, don't miss out on your fun! there is a perfect sledding hill past the swing set into the garden. However, we don't use those fancy sleds you get at the wal mart or mardens. One time, My grandmother gave us a piece of cardboard, and the lid of a trash can and it was honest to God, some of the most fun hill sledding ever. A piece. Of. Cardboard.

Still not buying the Canadian border lifestyle? Let's head a little further south. To about 2 miles below the Speed Limit 75 sign. College town, my old stomping grounds, Orono. Where kids go when they can't afford to go out of state, but don't want to be a commuter, or don't want to go to USM because EVERYONE from your high school will be there. So we go to Orono for the thrill and excitement of the Umaine where only 75% of your graduating class starts off..they get weeded out in time though. They'll transfer to USM or SMCC and sometimes the adventurous ones go to St. Joe's. But we'll visit Orono for a bit. There is literally nothing there unless you go to the college. Every car you drive past has a Umaine parking pass. A student, faculty, staff, janitor, dining hall worker, anything. It IS cool if you're going to school there though. Orono is usually referred to as "The best 5 years of my life" and It's true! I met some of the best people in my life there. I gained a lot of frisbee skills, I widened my comfort zone, and I even fit in some classes. I joined hip hop club at Umaine, Orono. And I want to discuss how awesome that statement is. Hip Hop. In Orono Maine. We blasted rap in dance studio room 226, and choreographed some back street dance crew routines. Don't underestimate white kids in the northern tip of this country. I don't attend UMO anymore, but what I miss the most (besides friends obviously) is this club. I think that if people gave it a chance, Maine could be as badass as the streets of Manhatten. I hope I'm still alive when there are legit dance offs with beats coming from either a beat boxer, or a boom box at the community basketball court, in central Maine. 

Another fact of Umaine alumni. If you went to school there at standard college age, and you turned 21 there. you own a Umaine shot glass. Am I wrong? It's like a cool 'you're part of a special crowd' thing. The food in the area. I'm sure they planned this, but it's all perfect hangover food...You got your Margaritas, Verve which is a small place spcializing in burritos, and then all of these random pizza places. But they all taste fantastic....especially Pat's, that's just an classic. And not to mention the Orono location is where the whole chain started! and it still has the feel of an old pizza parlor

For a nice dinner, or relaxing drink, Woodman's right across from Pat's has you covered. It's a dim, cozy place with a chill and friendly environment. The food is to die for, and the bar is loaded and ready to fulfill the needs of a stressed out college kid.

As we continue down I95, we find Bangor. "Banger" ..I hardly KNOW her! <<That joke, yeahh Mainers have NEVER heard that on before...*Sarcasm. Bangor is like..The herpe on the state of Maine. It's the skid mark on Maine's underwear. It's the Meg of the Maine city family. In case you can't tell, I'm not a huge fan of Bangor. I worked customer service in the ghetto of Bangor and dealt with a lot of white trash, bath salt infused just plain rude and unpleasant people. Please don't judge Maine on what goes down in Bangor. It's just one giant trailer park with a mall.

Maine is really a beautiful place though. In the summer time, you have a beer in your hand. You're not always trying to get drunk, it's just there...whatever you're doing. fishing- beer. beach-beer. This summer I'm making it a habit to save bottle caps. All different types of beers, and each cap probably has a story. This past summer for example would have included :

-First beer with my brother
-Beer from the time I actually beat dad at cribbage
-That intense game of cornhole, beer
etc etc.

Speaking of beer, Portland Maine is home to some of the best baseball games out there. No matter what you're doing in Maine..visiting, doing time in the state prison, whatever. Go to a Sea Dogs game. Cheap seats, that perfect 'summer night baseball game' atmosphere. Slugger gives some of the best hugs I've ever had. AND if you're a baseball nerd, some of the guys playing make it to the big stage. But until they do, enjoy getting third baseline seats for $10, eat your hot dog and be happy.

Portland Headlight. Not in Portland. It's a small quirk about Maine that most tourists don't know. In fact, you go over the casco bay bridge, into South Portland, stay in the right lane of the bridge. go straight through the next 2 sets of lights, and then bang a right at the playground/private school. keep going straight and you'll end up in Cape Elizabeth and you'll see the gate on your left to 'Fort Williams/Portland Headlight'.......Yeah. PORTLAND headlight is 2 towns away from Portland. Deal with it. Because it's a fantastic park. 

This is a favorite spot for families like mine, you can fly kites, explore the fort, play frisbee, have a picnic AND It's cheaper than....

Growing up in Maine comes with the summer ritual of going to Funtown. Until you're old enough to know what Six Flags, Disneyland, and Busch Gardens are, Funtown was like....your eyes just went all 'JimmyFallon impersonating Rob Ford' when you're parents said "We're going to Funtown this Saturday! 

I've only been to another amusement park once. Six Flags on a school trip and it rained so we were able to go on like 2 rides. So Funtown is still the most exciting place I've been. OH and when you're listening to the radio in the summer time and that commercial comes on, yeahhhh you Mainers know what I'm talking about. you NEED to say the 'ohhhh yeahhh' in a deep voice and sing the rest of the jingle. 

You can't talk about southern Maine in the summer without touching on Old Orchard Beach. Or as white girl wasted girls only know it as 'OOB' "like why did they name a beach boob...but without the first B.." If you want to see white trash capitol of the world, a beach that only Honey Boo Boo and mama June could love, Head down to Old Orchard! 

Don't get me wrong, it's not bad if you go with the right people. The Beach is huge. My friends and I go there and have some of the most intense games of '500' ever, but some of the things you see....can't be unseen...speedo capitol of the world I'm saying...Oh and you have to pay to use the bathroom.....50 cents last I checked. Thanks a lot LePage...Like if I eat too much Chipotle on the way and I ...let's say don't have time to fish around for 50 cents in my wallet, then you can deal with the mess....That's all I'll say about that. 

Notice a lot of the places I've mentioned, I've had my complaints about. But the best thing about it, is I also stated that it's fun if you're with the right people. Maine is all about making your own fun and excitement with your friends and family. My summers are spent on my back deck, watching the ball game, playing cribbage and wiffle ball and laughing with the family until the bon fire is out and there are no more marshmellows in the bag. Winter is tough, but with my friends playing wii and having adventures in the Old Port, Life is good...I finally get it... 'The Way Life Should Be' ...With friends and family making even the most boring state a fun place to be. 

The people can be annoying sometimes. Those hicks at wal mart that are all bad because they're out past their 10 PM curfew, and the Maine "gangsters" these are the kids that talk all bad on facebook. Wear their pants below their butt cracks, wear flat brimmed hats barely on their heads, rev their honda civics in the taco bell drive thru. But find the right Mainers and you'll have a hell of a time. (Just don't come in the winter because we're cranky and our cars are broken) ;) 

That doesn't even touch base on a lot of the things Maine has to offer. Moosehead lake, Acadia national park, among others are places that I haven't been to yet, but I'm working on it. Those City folk always make fun of us and say we wipe our butts with pine cones, and ride moose out into the woods, that's not true. (Well maybe it is in Fort Kent...) Just kidding, but anyways, I'm very happy that I was born and raised in Maine because it makes travelling to other places SO much more exciting.

PS, no we don't like our Governor either...in fact it's a touchy subject so if you come for a visit.don't bring it up. 

But definitely come visit! We'll get the pegs ready and get the cooler filled! 

Want to do some reading?

Hello Blog readers, facebookers, strangers, relatives, friends, twitter peeps, and anyone else reading this. This is not a life in the middle blog post, but I've been working on some writing. This is a potential screen play, or book. (I know it's not in screenplay form or even has any dialogue yet, hear me out) Anyways, this is just something I came up with that I want to work with and maybe if it's good enough and gets a positive reaction I'll publish it some day and you can be like watching the Oscars and couple years from now, and hear "And the award for best screenplay goes to.... Brianna Johnston" and then you can be like hey! I read that the night she came up with it in her blog....it's also really late and I'm really tired so I have these thoughts...anyways, I welcome feedback! enjoy!

(1)

I want to make it perfectly clear that I’m not an emo, thick eye liner wearing, suicidal themed poem writing, starbucks drinking, Lorde blasting in my hatchback subaru type of lonely. I have too many siblings and grew up in a far too thick of a cloud of joyful, lovable, loud, hectic, mess of chaos to be that kind of lonely and depressed. It’s more like, I’m lonely because I don’t go out enough, or meet enough different people kind of lonely. Does that make sense? I love life stories. I want to talk to people and trade stories, and make people smile and find out what makes them happy. Have you ever asked someone what makes them happy? I work at KFC whose signature utensil is a spork. These two little kids came up to me the other day asking for a fork. So I handed them a spork and they looked at me with the most genuine happiness and excitement. It’s a spoon plus a fork...That IS pretty damn cool but us adults are so wrapped up and busy and tense that we don’t bat an eyelash at it. I will always remember hearing “WOAHH! it’s a spork!” and their laughter and the odd product. You can’t get that shit at Wal Mart, and if you can’t find it at Wal Mart, then that’s a pretty rare and special thing. Even if it’s as simple as a spork. So get excited about the sporks of life.

I want to talk to people that talk honestly, directly from their brain. You were expecting me to say heart, weren’t you? Well I have a secret. It’s not even a secret, in fact every knows it, but not everyone thinks about it. The truth is, you can’t speak from your heart. Your heart only pumps blood. It’s a vital organ, don’t get me wrong. But your train of thoughts is a trip that starts from your brain, and finishes at your lips. And there are no round trip tickets for this train so once it’s out, there is no taking it back. Honesty. Real words that come straight from your thoughts. I like people’s thoughts. Feeling lonely (But that special kind of lonely remember), and wanting to talk to people and share stories, it was probably best that I get a single dorm room for my sophomore year of college. Sarcasm. I was forced into picking the runt of the litter of dorm buildings at the University. I had a room on the top floor. My living space was not the peacock of the zoo. It was like the curly headed ginger in gym class with his shirt tucked into his shorts with his tighty whitey tag hanging out hosting his initials written in permanent marker. Picked last for playground basketball. But hey that kid has all eyes on him when dodgeball starts. Silver Development. (Spoiler: that kids grows up to be a stunt double in the matrix movies). The light in the room flickered upon turning on until about 3 mississippi, the walls were peeling, the old wooden bookshelf in the corner had probably seen murders. The musty smelling old desk with “Rogers ‘76” etched into the drawer was most likely the home of a brand new Beatles vinyl back in the day. I moved in and unpacked by myself. I first hooked up my TV and rushed to turn anything on to ease the thickening silence. I turn on my booty call of TV channels, Game Show Network. There is always something good on that channel. An adorable Newlywed Game, and intense Deal or No Deal, and laugh generating Family Feud. It’s never dull. Except at 4 AM when the infomercials come on but ONE time I was almost persuaded to get that genie bra.

I continued unpacking, doing everything in my power to remain positive. This year was definitely going to be an academic building year. I hadn’t vibrated my vocal cords in almost 24 hours. I felt like I was in a dystopia where there are no words said aloud. Just faces, emotions, and your own thoughts. Wait...That’s probably what being deaf is like..and I realize, that’s not a dystopia at all, that’s just a bad card in your whole hand you were dealt for life. I have it pretty good. I might hate being alone with my thoughts, but I can hear the rain on the window which reminds me that I have a window which means I have somewhere to live and stay warm and dry. I can hear birds chirping which reminds me that happiness exists all over. I can hear myself breathing which reminds me that I was given the gift of life which is only a one in 40 million chance as it is, so that’s pretty fucking cool. Let me revert to my home life for a bit. I have six siblings. Two of which adoptees from China. Early in life, they had the ‘draw 4’ card of UNO placed in front of them. My sister had heart defects and was abandoned by her birth parents. Being female in China is hard. That’s an understatement. She lived in an orphanage as just another face in the crowd in the playroom. Just enough food, a blanket and pillow which were the same color as the blanket covering the kid to the left and to the right. Nothing that made her an individual. Today, she’s one of the smartest kids I know. Gets a high and a rush through walking onto a lit up stage ready to perform a musical. I see an overwhelming sense of belonging on her face when she dives into a pool, muscles prepared for a race which to kids that age, might as well be the gold medal race at the Olympics. My little brother was abandoned carrying the burden of a cleft palate, cleft lip combo. Again, lived his crucial developmental years as a victim to lack of individuality. Today, he has one of the most positive attitudes I’ve ever known.  He spreads a smile at almost everything. He sings in the shower, the car, while he’s using the toilet and also preparing for a musical despite speech restrictions. He’s come a long way, but still has a speech impediment and he knows it, and he’s self conscious about it. However, he’s not letting that stop him, or even slow him down. He still plans on full heartedly getting on that stage in front of a hundred people to sing, and dance to bring smiles to the faces of small town people. He will never know how much of an inspiration that is to me.
Do you see what I’m saying with all of this? There kids were given black and white paint to make something on their canvas of life, and they found a way to paint rainbows and beautiful pictures in spite of what they were given.

Current Events and Johnston Chaos

I wasn't going to write up a post for today because I didn't think there was enough material in the Johnston's week, but as I sat down and started making my 'blog list' and notes, I was kind of like "well damn.." SO here I am. And I encourage you to do the same. If you ever think not much has been happening, sit down and make a list and relive all the fun you had.

Unless your list includes, but is not limited to-

-Got in a fender bender
-Debit card got hacked at Target
-Tax refund still hasn't come in
-Still stuck on 21 in flappy bird
-Didn't download flappy bird in time
-Still stuck on level 102 in Candy Crush Saga
-Ran out of nutella
-Moved to New England
-Snow blower broke
-Don't have a snowblower at all
-You Live in Atlanta
-You Live in Russia
-Got locked in a Sochi Bathroom
-Are a Male Russian Hockey player
-Are a Male/Female USA Hockey player
-Got reaped for the Hunger Games
-Found your 7th grade school picture
-Your name is Jay Leno
-You weren't clever enough to sell girl scout cookies outside of a marijuana dispensary in Colorado
-Senecca Crane didn't yell 'stop!' and announce you as victor and so you went on eating those poison berries
-You're this guy:

-You found your 8th grade school picture...
-You got arrested for drag racing your rented yellow Ferrari
-You were the luge board that Al Roker and Matt Lauer rode on
-Your child has been riding in one of those recalled car seats
-You ate some of that meat on the recall list
-You received a letter reminding you that you owe thousands of dollars for student loans
-You still didn't get the balls to confess your love to that person on Valentine's day
-You're one of those kids that fell on the ice in the video from the dad picking his kids up from school. (I'm still laughing at you by the way)

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/trending-now/laughing-dad-films-students-falling-on-ice-outside-of-school-170619352.html

-Your local Taco Bell does not have baja blast mountain dew
-You don't have a Taco Bell locally...
-You DID get your taxes back but you spent them already
-Your dad got trampled by wildebeasts
-You had to kill your uncle for vengeance
-Your parents tenure at Northwestern ran up and so it was goodbye Africa
-You were personally victimized by Regina George
-You're a member of the New York Yankees
-You went in your back yard and yelled "Fee-hee-hee-hee-nay!" and Mr. Feeny didn't show up..
-You're Marcus..

-You caught the flu
-You hit your step dad's Babe Ruth signed baseball over the fence into the grips of 'the beast'
-You stubbed your pinkie toe


Then STOP your list right now, and pray, (And I will pray for you) that you have a better week next week!

So let's get started. Jimmy Fallon started the tonight show this week. Personally, I find him such an inspiration, I love his style of comedy. If I got anywhere with a writing gig, I wouldn't mind working with him. That would be pretty epic actually. If you missed it, you have to check out the part where all of the A-list stars made their appearances giving him money one by one. "Welcome to 11:30..bitch" -Stephen Colbert was my absolute favorite line in the whole shin dig.
You should also check out the Brian Williams rap:

My mom and I share our love for Jimmy Fallon and I hope to keep sharing good things about him.

The Olympics are still happening, and therefore 'Shit in Sochi' continues to go down as hard as all the skiiers and snow boarders on the crappy conditions. Why the actual F*** are they hosting the WINTER Olympics in a sub tropic city....Before the Olympics started people kept talking about terrorist attacks and how Russia was a really dangerous place and there was a lot of fear of something happening during the games.... And they were right! Except it was violent in a way we weren't really thinking of. Russia is taking out winter athletes one by one! Way to go Putin....more like RASputin...

Das Vid 'Murica


I read an article that on the set of 'Murican Hustle, Jennifer Lawrence would snack on doritos and then wipe her orange nacho cheese fingers on her white dress for the movie...and people are all like "lol oh Jen being Jen..." If I did that shit on one of my grungy T shirts at home, I'd get sent to bed without supper, grounded for a week, and not allowed to eat Doritos anymore...Ok well maybe my parents aren't that harsh but you get the point.
FOLLOW UP: On the set of Catching Fire, America's sweetheart almost lost an $8,000 bow in the ocean... -"repeat lol jen being jen  So basically, she comes close to ruining costumes and props and yet I still really want to work with her on a movie....Hollywood's weird..Life is weird. My family is weird. That's right, the current events portion of the blog is over so let's get to the Johnston Jumbles 
The rents got a new car this weekend.

And it's not a mini van....In my 21 years in this family we have always had a mini van. It's the end of an era. I'm so proud of them. I had to laugh, my aunt asked if they need a refresher course on driving a sedan. I think it's going to take some getting used to for sure. The Johnston parents owning a cool car is a new thing, but I'm excited for the adjustment.
This weekend was also family bonding weekend. Every we use up dad's hotel reward points he gets from work and we spend a night at some suites a few towns over. We're allowed to bring friends and it's usually always a different crowd This years ruckus troop included: the Johnston makers/adopters, myself, the chinese youngsters, Nephew, sister #2 +friend, Melissa, Melissa's daughter (mini Melissa) and I feel like I'm forgetting someone, but that's normal in our family. So we took up 3 suites and the highlight for me was our apples to apples game.

Playing with a nice mix of little kids and adults usually causes for some laughs. Cameron (Nephew) who was 6 years old until about 6 this morning. Is still learning how to read. "I don't know what this says but I'm just going to roll with it" He got a chuckle out of the words 'crystal balls' but was hesitant on explaining why....

Dad got real carried away and was the life of the party...

We get to the hotel and we were having dinner. The news was on it's part where it talks about the not huge news stories but more like people interest stories. Turns out Thursday was national 'Love your pet day' ...that's a holiday? Shouldn't that be every day? I also find it ironic that it's the day we left our dogs for a night in the hotel....**calm down PETA we left food, and water, and one Johnston was home with them that night.

But before I left for the family fun night, I played with them in the snow and got a couple awesome shots.. of Lily and Moses:

And on a very happy side of things, today is not only my Nephews Birthday, but Chandler's, what we call 'Gotcha Day' so it was a day to celebrate for these two

Cameron turned 7. And today marks 8 years since we adopted Chandler. 8 years ago, this chubby little 4 year old Chinese boy walked into my life, into my arms for our first hug, and I my heart would grab on forever and never let go. This kid is my best friend and brings me so much happiness, I love February 21st for the mere fact that we celebrate his joining of the family. He changed my life. People are meant for each other. Spending your firs few years of life in an orphanage may seem dark, but our family is his light, as he is our light, and he was truly meant to be my brother, and out of the 7 billion people in this world, we found him and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Basement Dwellings:

This is the portion of the blog where I describe how living in the basement is going, being 21, out of school living with..I lost count of how many people. As you may know, older sister moved back in and lives in the living room area of the basement. She goes to sleep early, I get out of work late...do you see how this doesn't match up. So She shuts the lights off which is understandable. Frustrating because it's hard to navigate but I'm not about to be like 'hey can you sleep with the lights on until I get home, showered and settled by 1 in the morning, thanks man.'  NO. So I was already having a rough night. I'm personally more of a morning person so the closing shift at work gets tough when my brain shuts off at like 6 PM. So I get home and shower and come down the stairs. Pitch dark. in just a towel. Thinking I was at the bottom, I started walking like I was on level ground..that actually lead to missing, and falling down the last few stairs. I actually fit right in with the skiiers and snowboarders in Sochi. Being so close, and then choking on the terrain. So instinctively my body panics and tries to save itself. which ends up with me crashing into the wall and awkwardly catching the railing in my armpit. When I realized I lived I strangle to get the towel wrapped back around me and then in my head i was like "what the F, it's dark and nobody is around..." and so then I sprinted to my bedroom door in case some random person on my side of the basement with night vision could see me naked...because that's possible..I wanted to cry because it really hurt really bad but then I just ended up bursting out laughing at how funny it probably looked...

Another event happened just 10 minutes ago. Fellow basement dwelling sister had gone to bed so I was navigating in the dark again when I heard a low man's voice. I shit my pants first, and then I realized she was watching something on her iPad. So if you hear deep voices in your basement, it's probably just your sister. But if your sister doesn't own an iPad, or if you don't have a sister and you live in your basement alone and you hear a deep voice, then you too should shit your pants, but then cry, and then run to mommy and daddy.

That pretty much sums up this week in a nutshell, feel free to share, this post or any previous posts, follow me on twitter Briannajohns2  Instagram: Bjohnston2  

Keep watching Jimmy Fallon, drinking angry orchard, and never ever ever say no to an adventure. With that I'll leave you with this quote from Tina Fey. 

I'm here to make your Monday suck a little less.

I'm going to start off really blunt.

I hit my brother in the balls with a nerf weapon...

Did that reel you in?
Let me set the scene . It's Super bowl Sunday, Chandler's birthday. The house was packed with family, food, sugar, beer. It was an event. So much of an event that all 6 of my siblings were there. The Super Seven all at Johnston headquarters at the same time. The cool thing about my family is that we are all very different. Our personalities are unique, but similar. Does that make sense? Of course not, because it came out of a Johnston mouth. Basically, we have a good mix of personalities, that can either clash, or piece together like a puzzle.....That's the best description you're going to get by the way I really am struggling putting it into words..
Anyways, Elder brother, Travis and I are compatible when it comes to pranking, or just being a pest to the other. One of us craves getting the 'last word' well on February 2nd, I totally had it in the bag. For a little bit anyways..Here's the story.
Travis was chucking pretzels at me. I was being an innocent angel, and he was using snacks to get my annoyance up. I'm never one to back down from a challenge. I'm not mature enough to just ignore it. besides, maturity is boring. For Christmas, I got a nerf bow and arrow. Something to emphasize my hunger games fandom. I'm seriously the next Katniss, but that's a story for a different time. So I go and grab this:

And I sneak up the stairs with my game face on.....

And I turn the corner, and set aim. Now, what happens next, is NOT MY FAULT. Travis is taller than the rest of us. I'm shorter than most of us. My aim, was NOT where it hit. I pulled the arrow back and 'let it fly' like I heard president Snow say to do. 

In an attempt to dodge, Travis jumped, and the arrow drilled his downstairs danglers.

I made a 34 year old man fall to the ground, and tear up. Now let's look at the force of these things....Keep in mind I was only a few feet away...

The weapon itself looks small, but it's forceful. I tried to upload a video of it hitting the wall so you could hear its impact but technology is not cooperating today. So he was on the ground and so we called it even....Ok I called it even. I held onto my Ball Bashing Bow in fear that he would be looking for revenge. Well, I looked away from one minute and next thing I know, everyone around the table is silent. I look up and Travis is aiming right at me. I run for the kitchen which really just made me a bigger target. I'm really dumb when it comes to these things so don't judge my abilities when it comes to survival. In a matter of seconds, the roles were reversed and the arrow was speeding at MY baby maker. In all the excitement all I could muster was "HE HIT MY TWAT!!"
Turns out, my whole family cringes at the word 'twat' ...kind like most people (myself included) don't like the word moist..ugh I shuttered just typing it.
So by now, both of our 'sensitive areas' had been bruised and what is supposed to be a toy for little kids, now has a warning label on it at our house- No aiming for private parts.


A couple days later, I went to the gym and was working hard. I was feeling a good workout for that day. I step onto the treadmill ready to power out 3 miles worth of running. When I got a text message...the conversation went like this...

So instead of 3 miles, I ran one, called it good and headed for the landshark.
Us siblings don't usually propose one on one time. We're a close family, but we don't usually just ask one to hang out. So I thought it was nice, and cool and he offered our family choice in beer so how could I pass it up?
So I get to his house and he starts complaining that he hasn't made it into my family famous blog. What my family doesn't realize, is that you need to do something exciting, say something funny, basically do something that strangers would want to read about. Even if it's embarrassing. My mom is usually top notch in the funny department, but most of the conversations we have end with "And this DOES NOT go in your blog, do you understand me?!"
But my mom is a funny lady, so this is her understated credit.
Back to Beer talks with Big Brother- We start talking about life and catching up about what we want our futures to look like with school and such and I started talking about my writing and how I really want to go somewhere with it while I wait for my nursing classes to start. He got very intriguing, and I'm telling you, if you are ever feeling like you're stuck, or you're not sure what to do with you're life or you're feeling like giving up, go have beer with my brother, Andrew. You'll get your shit together. So we make this big plan for me that I really am going to pursue some writing stuff. He says "Turn an I COULD have, into an I DID." That's an Andrew J original. So I'll make a career out of it, and I'll get my name out. I will start a scholarship fund for KFC employees that work there through their college years. You know, fast food employees aren't always there because it's their only option, and they are stuck there. I want to make a public service announcement right now, that sometimes that drive thru worker that you call stupid, and can't handle a real job, might be working there, as well as 3 other jobs to save up for medical school and will be a brain surgeon one day. So think about that.  

The scholarship would go to kids like that, because I know that feeling. I won't be a brain surgeon, but you get the picture. We make this big plan and he comes up with the title "Colonels to Generals." Clever eh? So look for it, coming a few years down the road. We discuss how I want to go to LA at some point and talk to movie directors and producers on how to get into the business with my focus being in writing. He said that if I have the confidence, and I believe in myself, then that's when I go out and get what I want. "Once you get your confidence, you get your balls" Another gem said by him. So it was great to hang out with my brother since I see a lot of similarities between the two of us not only looks wise, but personality wise. So there you made it into the effin blog Andrew! but for real, I didn't put it in just because he asked. It was really a cool night at the dining room table, surrounded by landsharks.

Sibling bonding struck again when I was getting through a long shift at work and My older sister, Allison texted me asking if I wanted to spend my day off in Boston celebrating Chinese New Year. Well what doesn't sound fun about that? we discuss taking the train which I assumed to be early, like leave the house by 8 early, but she proves me wrong being the ambitious one that she is with "Ok train leaves Portland at 5:30 in the morning, we'll get to Boston by 8." Well shit. I knew the 4 AM alarm would be tough, but the next 15 hours would be worth it. We took subways to a cute little bagel shop, the freedom trail, Harvard, and then to Chinatown. It was pretty cool seeing all the culture packed into the streets

And then we finished the trip with some drinks at a bar that only Allison could find.
It was a long day but it was nice to get out of Maine for a bit. Now Andrew and I might be similar, but Allison and I are very different which can make for a very interesting mix. As you can tell from the 5:30 train, opposing the 8 AM train, our travelling style is different. She said it best on the way to the train "You've never traveled with me have you....?" Allison is very 'let's get our charlie tickets and hop on the subway and see where we get'  I use the subways by myself in the summer when I travel to see a friend from school and PERSONALLY I'm very precise with my traveling...-this is what time the train arrives, this is the subway I take to this exact location, I catch this train here blah blah blah. Plus, Allison runs up stairs. EVERY stair case we reached. I felt like a 90 year old getting to the top of a stair case of a subway terminal 5 minutes after she already reached the top. So there is traveling, but then there is traveling with Allison. Totally different ball game. But still fun to say the least, and I'm really glad I went despite previous plans to sleep in and watch movies on my day off.

So this blog pretty much sums up that I love my family to pieces.  Again I can't really put it to words. I try not to get cheesy all over the posts, but getting texts or phonecalls from them asking to hangout makes me the happiest. *Travis also called me this week asking if I wanted to go with a Red Claws game but I had to work so that plan didn't go through but the thought was there!
Although now I wonder i they really want to hang out with me or if they just want to get into the blog...I'm onto you guys... Just kidding, can't wait to share more family moments in the future! If you have siblings, or cousins, or just family members that you've never really hung out one on one with, GO DO IT. NOW.


Behind the Scenes of the Blog: When I was talking to Andrew about writing, I was explaining how I write this blog. You may notice some typos, grammatical errors or whatnot from time to time. That's because I don't edit the blog when I'm done. My writing style is very different. I type what I'm saying in my head. Like..I type how I would talk if I was saying all of this to someone out loud and sometimes I get so excited for a post or story that I just type like a lunatic and laugh at my own things and I can't wait to get done with a post but it's not because I get bored while typing, it's because I can't wait for people to see it. I know some people specifically that read the blog and say they laugh and it makes me happy writing something and saying in my head 'Oh man, I can't wait to hear what Melissa says about this one!' and so on. So that's what goes into the writing!

Tune in next time for another episode of Life in the Middle!